Saturday, 9 May 2015

Do You? Ever?

Do you ever think of me when you are just about to close your eyes for the day? Do you sometimes wake up and smile for no reason because you have dreamt of me? dreamt of us? Do I ever cross your mind when you feel that your insides would burst because something burdens it so much that it no longer has the strength to pump life one more time? Does your happiness ever taste bland because you can no longer share it with me?

Do your fingers ever linger at my name in your phone book when you are searching for somebody whose name starts with my initials? Do you sometimes, on an impulse, open the folder containing my pictures in your old laptop and never realize how minutes turn into hours?

Does my absence ever bother when you go on trips alone that were on ‘our’ wishlist? Does your heart ever skip a beat at the prospect of meeting me one more time, even if it is just from far away, even if we would be in a room full of people and we may not even share a single word?

Do you ever try and replay my voice in your head, the way I pronounced your name, the way I called you when I was angry and when I was happy or when I was passionately falling for you? Do you ever recall the way I looked into your eyes while we made love and you kept on asking why did I keep on staring in them? I never told you. All I answered was 'just'. Well, let me tell you today, I searched myself in them.

Do my thoughts ever hauntingly follow you while you are neck deep in most mundane works? Do you ever feel so lonely without me that you wouldn’t mind if you lost your breath right that moment because you just can’t see a point in continuing a life where I am not a part of it?

Do you, atleast in your mind, speak my name, when somebody mentions the word ‘love’? Tell me, do you? Ever? 

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